Paulo Coelho, the great author of one of my favourite books – The Alchemist, once said, “Don’t waste your time with explanation. People only listen to what they want to hear.”
This is a great and true saying. People will only listen to what they want to listen to, no matter how hard you try to change them.
In this article Id like to talk about how you are wasting your time trying to help people who do not wish to be helped.
We all want to help, well most of us do. We try to guide others to help them avoid failure and misery as much as we can but it doesn’t always work. Why? The truth is, everyone is on their own journey. They simply are who they are. If you ever manage to change someone that actually never physically asked to change, the change will never last. Ive seen people go months with a completely different attitude and mindset to life and it was pleasant to see. Ive also seen these people suddenly change back to just how they were when they started out before you offered your guidance. The truth is, you wasted your time. You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make it drink. People often get stuck in their ways and believe they understand life and can deal with it just fine. Im not here to judge people on right and wrong but most of the time these people are fronting that they are ok and they are doing just fine. These same people I’ve seen suffering with insecurities, lack of self love, depression, anxiety and all sorts of confusions about what is going on in their world. You see their weaknesses, sometimes you expose them for them to see, sometimes they fight back, other times they accept it and try to change. 99% of the time even if you get a slight glimpse of hope that they can progress, they regress and go back to just how they were.
The only people who can truly change are the ones that WANT to change themselves.
These are the people you and I can help. You cannot chose who you wish to change, they kind of have to chose you!
I say, offer your help to everyone. If they want it, they will take it, if they don’t then don’t worry about it. We have all tried to help those that we TRULY CARE about but it just doesn’t work like that. We have to let them do what they want and thats all we can do. You and I both no that slandering others for example is wrong, it shows lack of self love, judgment from the ego and insecurity but does the person that is doing so truly understand this? Do they even care? Do they want to learn how to self love and not be so insecure and judgmental anymore? The answer is, it doesn’t matter. You have to just let people be. We must not make judgements of others or try and fix them without their consent. Maybe they are supposed to stay broken… It is probably their journey.
Focus on you and you only until somebody truly wants your help. We naturally care for others but trust me, you will only waste time and energy trying to fix something that wants to stay broken. The suffering around us feels so real and the people seem so lost… its just how they have to be. It is right for their journey at this current moment in time.
Lastly do not be angered by the people that throw help back in your face. We’ve all had it happen to us. Its ok. Let them be angry, let them be spiteful, let karma teach them a lesson 🙂 Trust in the universe, trust in your soul and LOVE unconditionally. JUST BE.
BeLIEVE In Yourself
And Love All That Can Be Loved 🙂